As most parents know the high school years can be challenging, add to that the college recruiting process. I know first hand as we went through it with our daughter. Many times it is awkward for girls at this age to feel confident in putting themselves "out there" to be judged by anyone, let alone college coaches. The temptation for the parent is to take the lead and actually write the emails and make the contacts.
Whatever you do ........do not do this!
It is however appropriate to encourage your daughter and help her set goals to getting recruited. Sitting with your gymnast and making a list of schools she would be eligible to attend, and then coming alongside her to guide her, is a much better choice. College coaches can tell if letters and emails have been written by parents. Although I do not believe a college coach will turn away a recruit because of this issue, it is so much more encouraging to the coach if it appears the letter is coming directly from the heart of the athlete.
This principle of self-initiative frequently transfers over to great things in the recruiting process. Gymnasts who can communicate on her own, even if the letter has mistakes or is not eloquent, shows the desire and maturity of the athlete. Coaches are looking for leaders and communicators. They understand it can be hard for high school girls to write or call but they can see past that.
I remember walking through this process with our daughter, who was a soccer player. It was like pulling teeth to get her to write to a coach. She was a confident athlete and person. She had great grades and knew what she wanted, but when it came to emailing a coach back or calling a coach, she really struggled at times. I often thought it would be way easier if I just emailed the coach back, but in the end I knew that would not be best. It was a process that she needed to experience herself and be challenged to grow in new ways.
So I ask again "who does the recruiting in your house?". Make it a team effort, with the bulk of the work being done by the daughter. In the end, it is like anything else, she will feel great satisfaction in knowing she worked hard and will have learned lots of good things about herself along the way.
About Jill Hicks:
Jill Hicks is a former elite gymnast, Division I college athlete, club coach and Division I college gymnastics coach (Cal State Fullerton, Oregon State) and the owner of Jill Hicks Consulting, where she provides recruiting services and choreography for prospective student-athletes and their families. For further information visit: www.jhicksconsulting.com
Editor's Note: Publication of this article is not an endorsement of any recruiting service. Always check with the NCAA or your school's compliance officer for any questions regarding recruiting rules, the latest timelines, or other issues.